5 Reasons Your Guests Don't Want to Come Over

The Perfect Host Series

Amanda Sosnowski Interior Design Michigan | Hosting

Entertaining and hosting friends and family is so much fun. And the best feeling a host can have is knowing that people actually want to be there.


But what if they don’t?


What if your friends and family don’t want to come over? What if they avoid coming over?

As the perfect host, your job is to figure out why and fix it.


5 Reasons Your Guests Don’t Want to Come Over


1. Your Home Isn’t as Tidy as You Think


You’ve got kids and pets and they make messes. Everyone understands this, but while you don’t mind dodging toys or dealing with dog hair, your guests certainly don’t want to.


The Fix: Treat Every Guest Like an Honored Guest


Take a look around before guests arrive. What jumps out at you? Do you need to put out fresh towels? Do the counters or tables look cluttered? Take a look at every room your guests will see including the entry, powder room, and hallways.


Pro host tip: A quick photo allows you to see the whole room at once, making it easier to spot eyesores.

2. You Invite Too Many People


Most guests aren’t going to mind pulling up a few extra chairs at the table, but squeezing 10 people around your breakfast nook isn’t going to be cozy--it’s going to be cramped.


The Fix: Keep Group Size in Mind


Ask yourself if the space you’re going to entertain in can comfortably fit the people you want to invite. Comfortably is the key word. Guests want elbow room and don’t want to sacrifice their personal space to be entertained.


3. You Lack Actual Entertainment


I’m not saying you need to hire a band, but there’s nothing worse than a guest feeling like they have to entertain the host. You don’t need a minute by minute itinerary but you should have a good idea of how you’ll entertain your guests.


The Fix: Read the Crowd


You know your friends and family--what would they like to do? Some might prefer conversation around a backyard fireplace, while others would rather have cocktails on the terrace.


Make sure you read the crowd in the moment as well and have a back up plan in case you need to change tactics.


4. Your Furniture is Uncomfortable


This is a problem that is hard for guests to get past. Even if you’re an otherwise great host, if you stick a guest in an uncomfortable chair they will be eager to leave.


The Fix: Take a Seat


Sit in every seat you own before you offer it to a guest. If you wouldn’t want to spend several hours on that piece of furniture, don’t expect your guest to either.


Simply put: Your guests’ comfort is key. A good host puts a guest’s comfort above their own.

5. The Atmosphere is Off


If the mood, the atmosphere, or the ambiance is off for whatever reason, guests are likely to stay away. They may not even be able to articulate exactly what they find bothersome. That’s up to you to figure out.


The Fix: Keep it Classy


It can be hard for homeowners to pick up on this type of discomfort since it isn’t one specific item that can be pointed to as the culprit.


Your best bet for combating this issue is to opt for classy, comfortable furnishings. If the tone of a room is welcoming and warm, it appeals to everyone.


The Perfect Host Makes Guests Comfortable


The job of a host is to make guests feel comfortable and welcome. Be solicitous, think about everyone’s comfort before and during a gathering, and be flexible. If plans aren’t going well, be ready to switch it up. The perfect host can think on her feet to make guests feel welcome.


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